Aside

Words, can they really be married?

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 “Your body” should be “your business.” How you look after it, is “your choice” therefore the outcome: look, health, vitality, youthfulness is “your destiny.” These are examples of a good marriage of words, put together for maximum impact, food for thought. The most powerful tool we have, is our tongue. It has the power to build up or totally destroy; a relationship, marriage, community, business, organisation, and a nation. The tongue lets loose a mountain of words, sometimes used to motivate and elevate but often used to condemn and destroy. Words married together can unite or divide. We often use words loosely without a thought for their impact. The concept behind a marriage of words is the impact they have on our everyday lives. Understanding this marriage and how we use it, may help us to have a better outcome in all areas of our life. Look at this marriage: Responsibility and accountability – like any marriage the two become one, they belong together. Intertwined like ying and yang, yet people in positions of power and authority refuse to acknowledge their union, and so too do we, especially when it come to our health! Everybody wants to be responsible, but seldom do people want to be accountable, when the outcome is not so positive.

We do not want to live in a nanny state and that is acceptable. We want to decide what and how we drink, eat, sleep, live etc. “It’s my body and I will eat what I like, smoke when I want, drink what I feel” etc, yet when sickness and dysfunction happen we put our health completely into the hands of a third party with an ‘expectation’ they can fix us and when they don’t we are ‘disappointed’ or ‘disillusioned.’ Another three words that belong together. A doctor given 10 minutes in our allotted time, is ‘expected’ to be able to analyze all the variables in our life and come up with the right solution. The truth is though, if you are not assessing you are guessing!

 

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To create a movement towards empowerment, requires action from every corner of the globe. We talk openly about almost everything except our pelvic floor, and because no-one is talking, no-one is sharing:

  • Information for a better outcome
  • Dispelling myths about what happens to our pelvic floor after childbirth, menopause, old age etc
  • Other options besides operations that will never solve the problem in the longterm
  • There own experiences and how they resolved them
  • How they could help another

If we shared this information, there would not be such a need to feel so embarrassed. A sense of hope could replace a sense of hopelessness and a better outcome for the future for too many women who are now living in isolation at far to young an age.

It is time to embrace the ‘V’ word without being seen to be swearing. All things come through and happen through the vagina. It is time to embrace the ‘P’  & ‘F’ word also. Pelvic Floor that is. It is the foundation of the trunk, holding up / carrying the weight of all our internal organs in anatomical place – it links our inner and outer worlds and controls the lower limb system.  It is too precious not to and its debilitations too costly to a good quality of life!

Be Fifty, Fit and Fabulous! Go beyond that we a renewed confidence.

If 50 is the new 40 – then it really is too early to be written off as far as intimacy and laughter go.

If Fifty Shades of Grey is imagination, then Pelvic Floor Secrets is application!

“Be Ready, Be Educated”

Confident, Continent & Sexually Satisfied!

Now that is a marriage I am really happy to have.

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Time to embrace the ‘V’ word

As I approach my big 50 (very excited by God’s grace!) I am reflecting over the way our world has evolved and the use of vocabulary! What has made it into the Oxford dictionary – what’s acceptable as everyday colloquial language and what is not! And I have come to the conclusion now that if we are to really get to the bottom of this pelvic floor thing, that is blighting the lives of so many women, leaving them with a sense of hopelessness about a better future. I we truly want to give them an opportunity to keep their femininity intact – wombs where they belong etc, then we are going to have to embrace that ‘V’ word… V-A-G-I-N-A!

It is NOT a swear word, although you would think I said the worst word on the planet judging by the looks I get sometimes. I am NOT be CRUDE I am just using the word, man gave for the most precious part of our body. My “lady bits” too wordy, my “fanny’ too fluffy! The ‘V’ word.. my ‘V’ is an amazing set of muscles, that can either reward me or debilitate me. It is integral to good pelvic floor health, but it is seldom considered. Indeed many women find it hard to identify their pelvic floor because everyone is too embarrassed to say the ‘V’ word as a means of identification and so we sacrifice our internal “lady bits” instead. The organs that live inside and above our vagina are ours to keep. It is time to empower ourselves so that the 2nd half of our lives is just as enjoyable as the first.

When we are left with early onset menopause; hot flushes, vaginal dryness, loss of sensitivity etc, thinning hair and weight gain we may just wished we said the word Vagina in the first place. Our body is our business, so we must endeavour to understand and maintain ALL of it, rather than handing that responsibility to a third party – our doctor and/or consultant.

Pelvic Floor Secrets is nothing other than the best piece of information a woman can have. My Pelvic Floor Secrets are for sharing NOT hiding. What abut yours?

 

 

  • Run, laugh and jump (trampoline with the kids) without fear of embarrassing leaks / “Oops” moments.
  • Lift & carry without fear of prolapsed pelvic organs.
  • Enjoy your husband or partner tomorrow just as you did yesterday and today! 50 really is the new 40!

 www.pelvicfloorsecrets.com info@pelvicfloorsecrets.com

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1 Harley Street, London W1G 9QD

Stay blessed

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Is your Pelvic Floor Secr…

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Is your Pelvic Floor Secret a reward or a debilitation?

“OMG, can I really reverse my incontinence and stop using Tenalady?”

“OMG, can I really keep my organs inside my body and avoid a hysterectomy?”

These are just two of the many questions I get asked on a daily basis!

My Pelvic Floor Secrets continue to transform lives in as little as 6 weeks! Continent, confident and sexually satisfied! A true and pressing statement for many women, willing to do the work, B-E-C-A-U-S-E there is no other way! A vaginaplasty, or any other ‘designer vagina’ surgery D-O-E-S  N-O-T  teach you how to make these muscles responsive to ‘the load’ that is placed on the muscles of the pelvic floor on a daily basis. It does not prevent a prolapsed pelvic organ, or an incontinent embarrassing ‘Oops’ moment or how to effectively ‘grip’ your partner. Especially since La Perla and Tenalady were not designed to be worn together:

You may ‘appear’ tighter, but if you have not learned how to ‘use’ the muscles that give you both a seriously orgasmic experience then after a 2nd/3rd childbirth, an inevitable surgery diminishes the sensations further!

Too many women are hiding a Pelvic Floor Secret, yet I am sharing mine!

My Pelvic Floor Secrets empower: they give the confidence to go about your everyday activities whether in the boardroom or the bedroom! Dr Hilary Jones was on Lorraine last Thursday discussing the survey carried out for the pelvic floor debilitation known as incontinence. He said that their survey showed 84% of women suffer from incontinence, but less than 40% report to their doctor. Embarrassment being the No.1 reason. His solutions offered were:

  • Short-term use a tampon, Tenalady
  • Long-term TVT sling, botox = medical!

The problem with these two options are that they are both 3rd party! They rely on you giving your health and wellbeing to an external entity to assist you! What happened to you assisting yourself? There is      A-N-O-T-H-E-R way and I  H-A-V-E  I-T!

My Pelvic Floor Secrets will give you all the tools you need to preserve your femininity! The testimonial success is my qualification – my understanding of muscle and movement, means I approach my 50th birthday, confident, continent, and sexually satisfied. It means I do not mask – I laugh, jump, run, sneeze and trampoline without a 2nd thought and I am sharing! I know it is N-O-T a part of the ageing process and I want you to know it too.

I want to create a movement towards empowerment for women everywhere, but it does require a little input from you!

Your Pelvic Floor is loaded no matter what you do – and it is impacted by:

  • Running, sneezing, laughing
  • Jumping, skipping, trampoline
  • Squatting, pushing, pulling, twisting
  • Obesity, chronic coughing, asthma
  • Childbirth, menopause and old age

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Do not believe or accept that this is your destiny!

  • Your children need to apply themselves to get the right exam results.
  • You need to apply yourself as does your husband to make your marriage work and last. Your pelvic floor needs the same kind of application.

You just need to understand its roles and responsibility and then you can apply yourself accordingly to ensure the outcome that does not require hiding!

Change the way you multi-task and ensure that 

  • Incontinence,
  • Prolapsed pelvic organs and
  • Hiding a debilitating secret

ARE NOT YOUR PORTION!

http://www.pelvicfloorsecrets.com Book your consultation today! 0207 291 44999

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“Crazy, Sexy, Cool!”…

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“Crazy, Sexy, Cool!”

I attended the National Black Women Networt forum a couple of weeks ago and an amazing speaker Carole Pyke spoke to us about our story: that we all have one and it is not just the one we tell but also the one that people see initially that is used to judge whether we are authentic, engaging, likeable etc, all the things that help to elevate us as successful business professionals as well as individuals. Carole asked us to think of three words that describe who we are and I racked my brain, believing my new found elevation to 1 Harley Street, meant I should opt for words more ‘becoming’ of my new street address.

But I came back to the three words I have used to describe myself for years – an old TLC album title that has stuck to me like superglue: “Crazy, Sexy, Cool!”

  • Crazy can be interpreted in a number of ways, but for me it is the passion and craziness I have for my job and ability to make a significant difference to the lives of so many women which has allowed me to invest thousands into a book I KNOW is necessary, current, fills a massive void whilst educating, enlightening and empowering women everywhere. Indeed I want to create a movement towards empowerment of women everywhere: Confident, Continent & Sexually Satisfied

My husband says I am either crazy or a genius, to take something so taboo and personal and pursue the business potential WITHOUT the business plan or market research! Yet every time I say I am “The Pelvic Floor Conditioning Expert” somebody’s shoulders finally relax and at last they exhale! The horrors stories I hear from women almost on a daily basis about the “Not So Casual Exchange” of their femininity for natural childbirth is quite unbelievable. It is like handing over your whole health and wellbeing for this new experience to a third party who is made to be seen to have as little regard for YOUR pelvic floor as You! An education, rather than just an awareness is what Pelvic Floor Secrets is about, and you would have to be crazy to pursue such a project without a guaranteed return on your investment. It has to be said that if I had put together a comprehensive business plan, rather than respond to the pleas for help, I would never have followed this through and the women I have helped would have had a totally different outcome. Passion can make you do crazy things, but it also rewards the most.

  • I’m just sexy! That’s my opinion and I AM sticking to it. I am cellulite free – although it is threatening to reveal on this 50 year old body (Nov 2012 for that big day). I can run, laugh, sneeze without fear of embarrassment. I am sexually satisfied & I have a confidence that allows me to speak about the rewards and responsibility of our/my most precious gateway! I don’t look too bad for an ole girl:Image
  • I’m cool – under pressure, suffering some ridiculous “personal summers” aka hot flushes, but cool at the same time. The pressure is on, to ensure the book hits the right target audience and that audience is every woman and every man in his own right or the man that loves that woman who needs his support when her “bits” begin to let her down. The pressure is on to remain level headed and focussed when the economy is telling us to tighten our belts and reserve, not take on an office in one of the most prestigious areas and then go look for the business.  I am cool because no matter what happens, I tried. I put something together that is accessible at one end  and high-end at the same time. it is a book, a clinic and a series of workshops. I have already made a difference in women’s lives. Uterus’s that were due to be removed have remained intact. Embarrassing “Oops” moments have been eliminated – meaning La Perla is worn as it should be – minus Tenalady! and many women are enjoying increased pleasures of sex; after childbirth even more than before as well as on the other side of the menopause, with a renewed confidence.

I am Crazy, Sexy Cool. What are three words best describe you and how would you explain them?

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“A hysterectomy does not…

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“A hysterectomy does nothing for a woman’s femininity other to make her feel less of a woman, less feminine.

The first sign of womanhood is the shedding of blood when we begin our periods which for many can be as early as 8 years of age. It is the first sign that our uterus is in preparation for motherhood/adulthood and that we are no longer just ‘little girls.’ It changes the way we see our body, forcing us to be become aware of this most precious part of ourself when we can barely tie our shoe laces!

As we mature and head into adulthood and become more aware of our sexuality, we are left we little information about the significance of the changes, our responsibility for managing the changes and the consequence of an intimate encounter, which is more than just having a baby! The physiological changes within the body and especially the impact on the pelvic floor and the vaginal gateway should be mandatory teachings.

Conditions such as PGP – Pelvic Girdle Pain and the debilitations it can cause should be taught in schools since it affects approximately 25% of the adult population during gestation! Ask any sufferer about the pain and discomfort this can cause, many women having to use crutches – barely able to open their legs even enough to put on a pair of knickers, or use the lavatory without assistance.

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A lack of understanding about the importance of the pelvic floor during pregnancy as a “support system under increased pressure” (see diagram above)  in need of an increased level of strength (tightening) which also requires the same level of relaxation in delivery (the part that is frequently overlooked), can cause many women to suffer trauma.  During labour and delivery a tight or traumatised pelvic floor that does not know how to relax effectively to allow the baby along the vaginal canal with as minimal discomfort as possible, usually leads to difficulties during that delivery and inevitably a 3rd degree tear or worse. As a male friend and colleague said yesterday in studio “If little attention is paid to the pelvic floor, then labour is traumatic, not just for the woman, but also for the husband who witnesses and ‘hears’ the tear!” 

Post baby this is now increasingly resulting in a uterine prolapse for too many women in the late 20 or early 30’s. The prospect for many by the time they pluck up the courage to go to the doctor is hysterectomy! The problem with a hysterectomy at such an early age apart from not being able to bear more children, is a lack of understanding about the important role the uterus and cervix play in sexual function and identity (both sexual and personal). Sexual desire and a loss of libido can decrease after hysterectomy, due to damage to the nerves and supportive structures of the pelvic floor. For many women this can be very costly to their marriage and lead to psychological change which may cause depression and a loss or sense of purpose.

I met a beautiful young lady whom I began talking to about my work as she served me in a department store, who had the most horrendous experience with her first baby aged just 28. She was left in the care of a trainee nurse who cut straight through her pelvic floor muscles and then screaming at all the blood and terror she inflicted. She subsequently suffered a total uterine prolapse had 6 operations and has no chance of another baby and the hospital tried to cover-up offering just £100 in compensation! This experience has cost this beautiful English Rose her marriage, tested her sanity, helped by much counselling and an amazing support network! This should not be happening in 21st century Britain, where Richard Branson is developing the resources to fly us to Mars, selling tickets for £100k!

Since our femininity, womanhood and confidence are very closely tied to our cervix and uterus, it is quite perplexing to think that when we suffer fibroids, unusually heavy periods, chronic coughs or bad childbirth experience, we accept a hysterectomy as the only or best solution for the short-term to eliminate the pain without a thought for the repercussions:

  • early onset menopause once the levels of oestrogen drop
  • menopause can also lead to pelvic muscle weakness due to drop in hormone levels – this can lead to vaginal laxity, dryness & soreness making intercourse eventually untenable
  • may cause further misery with a prolapsed bladder – since the cervix assists in bladder support

It is important to know that an anterior bladder repair to ‘fix’ a cystocele (prolapsed bladder), cuts away the part of the bladder attached to the cervix and uterus and usually results in a uterine prolapse and a hysterectomy that removes a perfectly healthy cervix (for which not all cervix’s are so) usually leads to a subsequent bladder (cystocele) prolapse! 

In other words one problem solved, is another created, yet this information is rarely if ever, made available to the patient until they come back with a further complaint! This is a double whammy for the 1000’s of women who experience this on a daily basis, leaving them with a sense of hopelessness for a better outcome. It is not good enough to assume that a woman past her childbearing years does not “need” her feminine bits, or to treat her with such contempt that other options are not discussed or explored.

Indeed if you look up alternatives to hysterectomy on the internet, places  like the Cleveland Clinic list pelvic floor exercise as a No.1 alternative for uterine prolapse (obviously dependent on the degree of the prolapse)

Hysteropexy is a relatively new type of surgery, a lapraroscopic resuspension of the prolapsed uterus using a strip of synthetic mesh to lift the uterus and hold it in place. One end of the mesh is attached to the cervix and the other to a bone (sacrum or sacral bone) near your spine. Once in place, the mesh supports the uterus.

Benefits of a Hysteropexy:

  • Hysteropexy preserves the anatomy of the vagina – our femininity, suspending the uterus back in its normal position by reinforcing weakened ligaments with a mesh.
  • Laparoscopic hysteropexy is a minimally invasive procedure, with limited disruption to the surrounding organs such as bowel and bladder, a short operation time and quick recovery afterwards.
  • Many women choose hysteropexy because it enables them to ‘keep the uterus’ (as I say ‘keeping womanhood intact’). For many women, this may be influenced by a general desire to continue to feel young, intact and fertile (even after the menopause it is important psychologically). Many women express relief when they learn that the uterus can be preserved, as in most cases they had assumed that hysterectomy (removal of the uterus) was the only option.
  • For women wishing to have further children, an advantage of preserving the uterus can include preserving fertility.
  • The uterus and cervix may have an important role in sexual function. Sexual well-being may decrease after hysterectomy, due to damage to the nerves and supportive structures of the pelvic floor. In some women removal of the uterus may even influence sexual and personal identity. ( Bullet Point Reference: Oxford Radcliffe Hospitals NHS Trust).

Although laparoscopic hysteropexy is a relatively new procedure, initial results indicate that it is at least as effective as the ‘standard’ vaginal hysterectomy in curing prolapse. At the same time it offers the prospect of a move favourable outcome for sexual function of the vagina.

Our bodies really are more than technology and just as we love our iPads, iPhones, and Macs – our Gucci and Armani we must love our femininity enough to preserve it! There is no getting away from pelvic floor exercise and it IS NOT just for women of childbearing age or who have had or are having babies. Pelvic Floor Secrets is a revolution in exercise and education for this vitally important gateway and the conversations will go from a whisper to a shout, as more women begin to invest in the foundation of their femininity and the benefits it brings to every area of their life.

To find out more information about optimising your pelvic floor for life visit http://www.pelvlcfloorsecrets.com email info@pelvicfloorsecrets.com Tel: 020 7291 4499 Pelvic Floor Secrets 1 Harley Street London W1G 9QD.

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“Not all change is good,…

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“Not all change is good, especially in the area of pelvic floor health where our organs may become compromised and begin to let us down. Embrace change where is it beneficial and avoid at all costs where it is not!” Jenni Russell Author, Motivational Speaker, The Pelvic Floor Conditioning Expert.

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With fifty being the new forty, never before have we had such a plethora of powerful men and women, sexy, sassy and leading the way, in charge of their health, finance and future. From Barack Obama in the white house to our top daytime TV hosts, men and women of this ‘special age’ are looking younger, feeling younger and ‘acting’ younger. They have a certain swagger, a sex appeal that is not diminishing and appetite for sex that continues to increase.

But the real sexiness does not lie in what is seen, but what is rarely seen and/or even thought about. Our true measure of sexiness ‘unmasked’ is our pelvic floor. Its strength and condition can be the difference between a good night or a great night. A good experience that makes you want to go back for more or a bad one. Either way a lasting impression is left and it is this difference that is displayed daily in our confidence and the way we hold our heads, the glint in our eye, the depth of our laughter and swagger of our hips:

My Pelvic Floor, something you cannot see

Can either reward or debilitate me!

I can choose to ignore it and not value its role

Then under the knife I may just have to go

Extra protection I need when I laugh

And… ‘the feeling’ in intimacy… a memory that’s past

Or I can choose to acknowledge, condition and enjoy

“Gripping” and “lifting” and jumping for joy

A little attention, a few minutes a day and

 I can confidently…, ‘continently…’ be on my way.

Our pelvic floor really does take quite a battering after childbirth, as we approach the menopause, and even through lifestyle habits such as obesity and continuous impact exercise to name a few. But its longevity and our femininity are a consequence of how much or little attention we pay to it and NOT a mandatory part of our ageing process.

What motivated me to continue to pay attention to the vitally important gateway was purely sexual, after a friend made a comment some 20+ years ago, when his fiancé had their second baby. ‘My God Jen, now I know what they mean when they say it is like dipping your wick in a well!’ His throwaway comment and my vanity and quest to ensure that sex until God calls me home is something I can always ‘feel’ and enjoy has allowed me to remain ‘Tight’ and ‘Functional.’ I do not need to mask any ‘Oops’ moments by wearing an adult nappy. My organs that ‘sit on’ my pelvic floor have not dislodged from their home, to roam into my vaginal canal, causing pain and discomfort that would cause me to seek a solution, which from a medical standpoint equals hysterectomy or a false ‘floor’ which, by the way would still require a pelvic floor conditioning maintenance program to ensure it does not let me down five years on!

We live in a superficial world, measured not just by how we look, but also by how we feel – figuratively and literally. A vajazzle may make the outside look good, but the lasting impression is not the vajazzle but the ‘gripping’ experience that creates an orgasmic explosion. A vaginaplasty may make a ‘big hole’ smaller, but by trimming away nerve endings the sensations are lessened and this helps to keep the vagina lubricated – something that diminishes with the menopause which can make intercourse painful, unenjoyable and eventually untenable.

It does not have to be all doom and gloom. Every muscle likes exercise and as women we have the advantage of exercising not only our pelvic floors but also our vaginal canals. Plumping up the vaginal canal and increasing the strength and condition of the pelvic floor provides extra support and protection for our pelvic organs, allowing us to enjoy the trampoline with our children, or run, jump, skip, laugh without fear of an embarrassing ‘Oops’ moment and take our intimacy to some crazy insatiable heights. All of this means we have that ‘spring’ in our step that makes younger counterparts envious. We have accomplished great things by the time we reach this milestone and optimal pelvic floor health, should be one amongst our achievements. Everything starts with breath. Oxygen is nutrition for the body and our pelvic floor health is dependent on a grand oxygen supply and bloodflow. Diaphragmatic breathing is not elegant, but it is necessary. Constant tension within the abdominal wall to ensure we look good, can have long term detrimental affects on our pelvic floor. Flatter Abs is primarily about the foods we eat, the water we do or do not drink and the way our body detoxifies and eliminates waste! A distended tummy is usually a very full colon or intestine! Looking good and feeling good should always be ‘ happily married.’

{Male pelvic floor health is crucial for prostate and testicular health and the cremesteric cord, attached to the testicles is what helps to activate the pelvic floor and allows the testicles to be pulled up or lowered down. A strong male pelvic floor is able to get and keep a longer, stronger erection and produce more powerful ejaculation – something many male porn stars have been doing for years! Anal prolapse is never a position a man wants to find himself in, especially when the medical outcome is usually to remove and cut a part of the colon and then put back and staple the rest leaving most with a colostomy bag for life}.

With all the modern technology we now have and the things we can do, the places we can visit, the way our voice can be heard on a global viral scale, it is sad or even scary to think that our womanhood the foundation of our femininity is still being sacrificed in exchange for normal everyday activities and that we are accepting it as a part of our cycle of life! IT IS NOT, and it should not and does not require any special creams, medication or surgery. It just requires a reprogramming of the sensory system – the greatest software package on the planet – our brain to ensure we can remain in control at all times in all activities.

We really do not need to remain the brunt of any man’s jokes: “Women really can multitask. They can laugh, cry and pee at the same time!”

To find out more information about optimising your pelvic floor for life visit http://www.pelvlcfloorsecrets.com email info@pelvicfloorsecrets.com Tel: 020 7291 4499 Pelvic Floor Secrets 1 Harley Street London W1G 9QD.